Assalamualaikum. Hi. Long time didn't update anything on my blog. Well, let me update my another failure. I failed my relationship. Yes, for the ergh, idk for how many times. I'm such a loser. Well, obviously it was my bad. I asked him to live his life without me and hell yeah, he's living his life without me now. I amazed! I was wondering how can he get the strength to live without me but the I realized, he's a man and every men have their own ego to keep them strong. Awesome! I'm still build up my strength to face my life without him. Still hoping he will come back to me. Never stop believing what I've believed for a long time which is he will be my man. However, if he's not going to be my man, I hope all the feelings I have towards him will just vanish away and I won't turn back. Like seriously, I'm tired to find a new guy and to start a new relationship. All I can do now is make myself busy and trying to cheer up myself. No matter how hard I forced myself to avoid from thinking about him, there's always sometimes I will pause everything just to cry 'cause I really miss him. There's nothing I could do. I broke his trust. I broke his heart. I'm such a stupid bitch. Its almost one year be we failed. No, I failed. Gosh, how can I face the world when everything I did will reminds me to him. He's my prince, my baby, my sweetheart, my honey, my everything and now he's gone. Such a great lost. I'm not expecting his sympathy to accept me back. No. I just wish if he's the man that will be my husband, he will accept me back. Just like the very first time. If not, I will just let him go and will never turn back around. May Allah ease our life. Aamiin.
